You Know You Watch Too Much Star Trek^tm If...

Your second language is spoken only in the Gamma Quadrant

You've ever said "He's dead, Jim." in your best DeForest Kelley voice.

You try to find an episode where Kirk says "Beam me up, Scotty."

You cried when the Enterprise was destroyed in Star Trek III

You have an entire Web Page devoted to William Shatner!

You've ever gone up to someone wearing a red polyester shirt and offered your condolences.

You refer to your television remote control as your "phaser" and proceed to disintegrate any program that you don't like.

You frequent the Klingon^tm Only IRC channel.

Your idea of Current Events is finding out how relations between the Klingons and the Federation are near the Cardassian border.

You don't realize that Deanna's empathic powers really aren't that impressive. "Captain, I sense hostility." "Thank you, Counselor. Has the other ship stopped firing on us, Ensign?"

While driving down the highway, you've ever shouted "I'm givin' ‘er all she's got, Capten!"

You're able to suggest other ways to tell if you've watched Too Much Star Trek!

If you can complete the sentence "You know you watch too much Star Trek if..." in a way that isn't listed here, you can submit your suggestion by e-mailing it sto me, Stealth Dave, at stealhtdave@sprynet.com.. Any suggestions made become the property of this lists maintainer (me). I reserve the right to refuse any suggestion. I make no guarantees as to how often this list will be updated (depends on how busy I get).

Star Trek is a registered trademark of Paramount Entertainment.
Klingons are a registered trademark of Paramount Entertainment
Tribbles are probably a registered trademark of Paramount Entetainment.
The word "The" is not a registered trademark of Paramount Entertainment; but I'm sure they're working on it.